Week #43: Giving Up is Sometimes a Good Thing
October 21, 2007
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This Week's Topic: "Giving Up" is Sometimes a Good Thing
"...let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us." -- Hebrews 12:1 Dear Friend, On
a recent train ride, a stranger shared that she'd been with her
boyfriend for over twelve years. He doesn't want to get married
although she does, despite some shortcomings in the relationship that
have yet to be addressed. "I don't want to give up now," she said
sadly. "I've invested so many years." So she insists on persevering -
towards what, she is unsure. She doesn't like to quit, she explained.
And moving on would mean quitting. Of course, not moving on means she
might never have the marriage or family she hopes for either. Perhaps
you've never been stubbornly persistent in her type of situation, but
there may be other areas - large or small - in which you have held on
to the belief that quitting is always bad. This week, I want to remind
you that giving up is not the same as changing directions. You've got
to get clear about the "race marked out for you." What's your vision?
What are you meant to be doing? Persevere in that, and let everything
else go. On a few occasions recently, people have told me that
they were hanging on to an outdated goal or staying involved in an
activity because they didn't want to "give up." While it is true that
persistence and perseverance are admirable character traits, they
should only be applied to endeavors that empower you to become more of
who you are meant to be. There is a difference between giving up and
changing course. It is imperative that you distinguish between the two
and exercise the wisdom to know when it is time to do something
different. For example, when I gave up a public relations career to
follow my passion, it wasn't about quitting. It was about focusing my
energy on the best use of my gifts to help others. Sometimes,
giving up one thing makes room for something more meaningful. Today, I
invite you to consider that perhaps it is time to change course when it
comes to a particular endeavor or activity. You may have lost a passion
for it. Maybe it is no longer a priority in this season of your life.
Maybe there is something better in store for you. Learn from the
experience, then seek divine wisdom for a new direction. This may mean
slowing down enough to hear that still, small voice whispering in your
spirit. Whatever the case, know that it's OK. You were not meant to
persevere in all things. You were meant to persevere in the things you
are uniquely meant to be doing - the "race marked out for you." Use
these coaching questions to help you determine whether it is time to
change course: 1. What do you sense God telling you?
The
answers you need lie within you. Pray for the wisdom to make the right
decision and trust that you will receive it. When that guidance comes,
follow it! 2.What is the purpose of continuing down the path you are currently on?
Live your life on purpose. The choices you make will either fuel your ability to live on purpose or detract from it. 3.If you continue on this path, will it lead to your vision?
It's
hard to make decisions if you don't know where you're going! Have a
clear vision for the kind of life you want to live. Then you will know
what fits and what doesn't. 4.What would it look like to change directions?
Consider
your options. Daydream for a moment. If you stepped onto a new path,
what would it give you that you don't have right now? And what would
you have to give up? 5.What is the most important lesson being offered to you in this situation?
Learning
empowers you to grow. In the challenges and experiences of life, we
often discover who we truly are, what we are willing to do, and what we
are not. Perseverance is a key to success. It takes a lot of
energy to persevere. Passion and purpose give you the fuel to
persevere. So be sure you spend that energy to persevere towards the
goals, purpose, and vision that truly matter for you. My challenge to you this week:
If
it's time to change course, do it! Don't allow what others think or
misconceptions about "giving up" to keep you from stepping onto a
better path. Journaling assignment:
When it comes to a
matter in which it may be time to change course, what is your intuition
telling you? What would be the purpose of continuing down the path you
are currently on? If you stepped onto a new path, what would it give
you that you don't have right now? What lesson is being offered to you
right now?
Until next time ... Warm wishes,
 P.S. Encourage your friends and family by sharing this newsletter and invite others to subscribe! Just send them to
www.valorieburton.com, where they can enter their email address on the home page. Valorie
Burton, a life coach and speaker, is the author of Listen to Your Life,
Rich Minds, Rich Rewards, What's Really Holding You Back?, and her
latest, Why Not You?. Subscribe to her FREE, inspirational e-newsletter
at www.valorieburton.com.
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