Week #30: Carve out time for the people who matter most
July 23, 2006
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This Week's Topic: Carve out time for the people who matter most
"No man on his deathbed ever said, 'I wish I had spent more time at the office.'" - The late Sen. Paul Tsongas of Massachusetts
Dear Friend,
When
I married and moved to Maryland in 2003, my father serendipitously
received a promotion to move from Colorado to nearby northern Virginia.
We had not lived in the same city since I graduated high school and I
was excited that he’d be just 20 miles away. Despite the close
proximity, we both noticed something: We didn’t actually see one
another as often as we'd thought we would. Have you ever
noticed that life sometimes gets so busy that it gets in the way of
what you say is most important? It’s in those moments, that you must
reassess your priorities and make sure your schedule reflects them. If
you aren’t intentional about how you spend your time, it will slip
through your fingers without bringing you some of the experiences that
make your life rich and fulfilling. To make sure we made time
together a priority, Dad and I decided to set a standing appointment.
On Fridays, we meet for lunch. Same place. Same time. And on the
occasions when one of us cannot make it, we make it a point to see each
other at some other time. Our lunch date ensures that we never become
so busy that we go for weeks, living in the same metro area, without
visiting with each other face to face. We visit at other times, too, of
course, but we don't rely on happenstance and special occasions to see
each other regularly. This week, I invite you to take a moment to
consider the people with whom you most want to spend time on a regular
basis. Then carve out some time and put strong boundaries around it.
There is so much vying for your attention that you must be intentional
about making time for your relationships. For example, my husband and I
carve out weekends to spend time together doing things we love with
each other and people we care about. We also eat dinner together nearly
every day. I make it my rule not to go more than four months without
seeing my mother and little brother who live an hour-long plane ride
away. And I have couple of friends with whom I get together once a
month or so. If we don’t set a date, one of us calls the other to say,
“Hey, it’s time for us to get together.” To some, it may seem
ridiculous to set appointments with yourself and the people you care
about. Instead, I see it as a way to honor your most important
relationships. In a world in which there is always something calling
for your attention, it is essential that you take control of how you
spend your time and put boundaries around the time that’s meant for
your most important priority – your relationships. Here are a few ideas
to get you started: - Invite friends or family over once a month for an old-fashioned Sunday dinner.
- Eat breakfast or dinner together as a family.
- Choose a weekly “date night” for you and your spouse or significant other.
- Have a “game night” with your children or friends.
- Choose a favorite pastime and schedule regular time to enjoy it with someone you want to spend time with consistently.
-
Set a standard for how often you want to see loved ones who do not live
in your area. Honor your standard by taking out your calendar and
marking the dates.
- Carve out regular time just for you. Just as it
is important to make time for the important people in your life, it’s
important to make time just for you, too!
- Come up with your idea by brainstorming with the person you want to carve out time for! Living
an inspired life means aligning your true priorities with your
day-to-day actions. When you make time for your relationships, you’ll
notice that other less meaningful activities may fall by the wayside.
Take a deep breath and let them go. You can't be all things to all
people. Carve out time for the people who matter most to you. Enjoy! Journaling assignment:
With
whom do you need to be more intentional about spending quality time?
When, how and how often would you like to spend time with them? My challenge to you this week:
Carve
out time in your schedule for the people who matter most to you. Make
that time sacred by setting boundaries around it that cannot be
infringed upon by work, other people or less significant priorities.
Until next time ... Warm wishes,
 P.S. Encourage your friends and family by sharing this newsletter and invite others to subscribe! Just send them to
www.valorieburton.com, where they can enter their email address on the home page. Valorie
Burton, a life coach and speaker, is the author of Listen to Your Life,
Rich Minds, Rich Rewards and her latest, What's Really Holding You
Back?. She coaches groups and individuals to live their best lives.
Learn about her coaching groups and subscribe to her FREE,
inspirational e-newsletter at www.valorieburton.com.
Now Booking 2007 and 2008 Speaking Engagements
We are scheduling speaking engagements for 2007 and 2008. Interested in
booking Valorie to deliver a powerful, action-oriented message that
will help people transform the way they live and work? We'd love to
talk with you further. Fill out some basic information at
http://www.valorieburton.com/request.html and Angie Steele will be in
touch with you.
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to friends and colleagues, but please forward in its entirety. The Rich
Minds, Rich Rewards E-Newsletter is written and distributed by Inspire,
Inc. Copyright (c) 2005 Valorie Burton. All rights reserved. www.valorieburton.com.
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